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August 24, 2007 A Doctor? For Reals?
So, I went to New York this past week to defend my dissertation. It was tough. I guess it wouldn’t be much of an accomplishment for me if it was easy, but I’d rather it have been easy all the same. I passed! Woo. I still have to make some final changes before I submit it for publishing. Since I’m officially graduating in September, the changes have to be made rather quickly. So I’m still not feeling relieved or any of that. Maybe when I see the diploma. Or when I walk in May. It will be nice to be in NYC with my family cheering me on. I thought when they told me “congratulations, dr.” on Monday that tears would start streaming down my cheeks. But I don’t think I’ve ever been so emotionally removed from an event. I smiled, but I was just so glad that defense was over and I got to eat some food. I am so thankful for fellow PhD Vincent--who met with me before the defense, sat at the kid’s table in the conference room, and hung out with me into the evening. I like to feel completely independent, but it was nice to have someone to talk to throughout the day. And Tammie, who was patiently waiting down in the NYU lobby for me until it was over! Thank you!!! And it was great meeting up with a bunch of friends that evening, though I was way more exhausted than I had planned on being--and was back at my hotel by 10:30. So apologies to all those who hate me for NOT staying out late as promised. Again, I thought I would be on an emotional high--but that never really happened.
I came back to LA on an early Tuesday morning flight & went straight to Cal State to teach my class. And then to work on Wednesday. It’s my last week of classes with my current students, so there’s lots of last minute film editing going on with the projects. Last night, pretty much caught up with everything for work--I came home and couldn’t move. I watched horrible TV, unable to focus on anything else. I thought to myself, “I am burned out.” Physically, mentally, emotionally---I need the weekend I didn’t really get last weekend. Luckily, it’s Friday and the weekend is only several hours away.
So maybe another day I will have something deep to write about this whole experience. But for the next week or so, there is still work to be finalized and writing to do. I do want to thank my family and friends who not only wished me well at the defense--but who have supported me through this entire whirlwind process. I can say I’ve gotten through the program faster than anyone else---now, I’m sure in some people’s mind--slow and steady win the race--but I can tell you from the 5ks I’ve been in, you don’t get a medal if that’s your strategy. And what is life without medals?
The brilliant news is that I can actually have a social life now. I can have fun!!! I can see movies without guilt. I can train for my triathlon and upcoming half marathon! I can really start to enjoy L.A. Someone asked me if I would be depressed when I didn’t have the dissertation to think about anymore. I can answer pretty positively “NO!”
I thought I was going to go back to Texas for Labor Day, but it looks like I will wait until mid-September for a weekend trip...and then a trip to Denver in late October (which my brother doesn’t know about yet---I’m coming, John!). My best buddy Doug will be on his national tour there, so I must go support.
The actual trip to New York was SO short. I spent an entire afternoon/evening studying, too, which didn’t help. I was lucky enough to get a run in at Prospect Park in Brooklyn on Sunday & then in central park on Monday. And my weekend brunch happened on sunday, which was always a highlight of my new york days. I will be very happy to visit again soon without any school work to do. I sure do miss the people there, even though I can’t really imagine living there again.
But now that I have some Sunday running buddies here in LA, I’m definitely making it my home. And can’t wait until Annette and family fly out in October for our big Long Beach Half marathon bonanza.
Have a great weekend!
August 9, 2007 Shakin’
An earthquake woke me up last night. It wasn’t bad, but for some reason I’ve always been very sensitive to the ground shaking like crazy. I was proud of myself for getting to bed early, avoiding the temptation of Big Brother live feeds on showtime--only to wake up at 1:00am thinking someone was breaking into my apartment. My second thought was “ooh, I have a mouse!” I guess I still haven’t been away from New York long enough. Finally, my brain turned on & I recognized that it was an earthquake. My heart was beating fast, and I spent a good 20 minutes on the internet trying to confirm there was an earthquake--and then an additional hour watching big brother on showtime cause i couldn’t get back to sleep (curses, you DVR recorder!!!). Needless to say, the day is over & I’m really tired.
The whole week has been pretty much sleepy, for various reasons. One of those weeks, I guess. I’m headed down the home stretch of classes this session. We have two more weeks & the summer session is over. I have once again taken on too much in my curriculum, and I find myself drowning in a world of short films about ninja kitties and bloody mary. It is rewarding. It’s creative. It’s just too much at the moment, and the only one to blame is me. I will be proud of it all when it’s over...just two more weeks! My university class is also over in two weeks. I’ve never taught anyone this many hours--just me and them. I am almost out of anything to say or teach. My bag of tricks: eh, not that big!
I’m starting to ‘shake’ about the dissertation defense as well. It is hard to focus on my writing in addition to work and working out...but i’m doing my best. There’s also all this paperwork crap involved with this stuff---and paperwork is always a weakness for me. I will never be so happy to see anything as I will that diploma, whenever it may come. As I read over my dissertation again, I’m scared that it just isn’t that great--that my readers in the room will be rolling their eyes at the sloppiness of the writing style, the lack of big vocabulary, the simplicity of thought. I try to balance this by giving myself a break--I mean, it’s my first real piece of writing. Isn’t it allowed to be flawed? Don’t worry, I won’t be asking that in the defense. Turns out, I know 4 of the 5 readers who will be voting for me that day. I’m not sure if this is good or bad. I’m just hoping to find enough time in the next 10 days to feel completely prepared.
I feel isolated because most of my days lately have been spent working--whether on school, for this college class I’m teaching, or at work. I get a little depressed when I can’t seem to find a balance between fun and work. Regardless of the quality of the experience, too much work always leaves me feeling a bit lonely. 10 more days, hopefully...then, for the first time in 3 years, I can truly be DONE with something.
Despite my complaints, I have branched out a bit & am starting to feel more social and at home in this city. I’ve got new weekend running buddies (not to mention my NYC running buddy...who is in town & will be running with me at 6:30am tomorrow!!!), enjoyed some meals out, and got into a free screening of a movie this week due to the kindness of an old buddy. There are good times to be had here. I’m just ready to be done with school.
We have recently begun construction on a huge expansion project at work--building an incredible black box theatre for Inner-City Arts--in addition to a new ceramics building & a library. Amazing as it is, we’ve had to close our parking lot & now have to park on a roof down the block. While I only used to drive by the homeless, crackheads, drunk people--now I get to walk alongside of them on a daily basis. I never knew a block could reek so badly of urine and other horrid smells. You wouldn’t believe it. This area is actually called “skid row.” I thought that phrase went out in the 50s or something. Rows of people living in boxes. It is never far from my mind that several miles west is one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the country. I wish Angelina and Brad would come around, adopt a couple of homeless folks, pay to have the walls and road shampooed or something. I wish Oprah would open a school here, giving all the homeless brand new school uniforms & dorm rooms. It is good that I’m out in the middle of it, though. It isn’t a neighborhood I’ll ever forget, and that’s a good thing--not being too comfortable with your life and your surroundings. I think it’s easy to forget that neighborhoods like this exist--I mean, that’s the whole point of trying to “contain” the homeless into one small section of the city anyway.
Oh, and in non-crack related news--my good friend Doug T. has just been cast as a lead in the national tour of the musical Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. Me and my little brother saw this hilarious show on Broadway, and I’m so proud that Doug is in this thing!!! It’s the big time! So, see the show if it comes through your town.
Have a great weekend! I’m SO ready for it!
July 21, 2007 I’m 29!!!
That’s the big new of the week. Besides that NBA referee possibly fixing games and being tied to the mob. The least he could’ve done was bet on the Rockets.
Anyway, it was a great birthday week! It started last Sunday, when Doug and Chuck arrived into town. We grabbed some brunch, I worked out, and we headed over to our karaoke party in Koreatown. This place was crazy--nothing but private rooms, and we had a large one lined with sofas, tables, 2 microphones, 2 tvs, and TAMBOURINES!!! It was a great experience. Mostly because we were there for four hours, and at its largest--there were probably only 10 people there. That meant I got to sing to my heart’s content, and try songs I probably shouldn’t have tried. Don’t try to sing Kelly Clarkson unless you really can sing. But Michael Jackson? Go for it! My party favors were a success, and I have plenty of bouncy balls and Nerds left over for my own enjoyment.
Chuck and Doug stayed until Wednesday night, so my days were spent working & then spent as much time with them as I could handle. We went to the beach, had a game night, watched bad TV, and went to several great restaurants. It was so great having these guys here--we’ve known each other and been the closest of friends for so many years now. It is the highest level of comfort when I’m around them...really, just like my family. I wish they didn’t live so far away, but I’m convinced we’ll end up in the same city again soon.
Everything else is going pretty smoothly. I got called to interview for some game show involving bingo. I figure it’s low skill enough for me to actually win. I will let you know how that goes.
Classes are going well, I barely got all of my triathlon training in with guests and partying, and have worked out WAY too much in the past three days. Still have my personal trainer, who is the best--even though I’m annoyed with him the entire time he’s making me squat and lunge my way around the gym. I love this tri stuff because at no point when I’m working out do I think, “I’d rather be doing something else.” All three activities are fun, especially when I get to mix them up.
Hope you enjoy the updates this week! I’ll do my best to be more consistent in the future.
July 12, 2007
I get overwhelmed with updates that include new pictures, so I’ve been writing without uploading lately. Someday you will be reading this, though. I’m still planning on moving my website to the mac computer soon, but I’m too lazy at the moment.
It’s Thursday, and I am of course ready for the weekend. It’s a fun one, with two of my closest friends coming into town & several parties (including mine!!!)—some of which include open bars (not mine). I normally don’t think twice about clothes, except for some reason on my birthday it’s very important that I dress up (except for last year, when the heat dictated my wardrobe). Luckily, I move around so much, that I can wear old clothes that will appear new to this crowd. That leaves room for a new shoe purchase, which should be fun. The only way I can shop is with a specific mission (or money that is not coming out of my own paycheck), so I’m actually looking forward to it.
It has been a great week for working out because I’ve found an official triathlon training plan that is really easy to keep track of. My ultimate goal is to compete in an Olympic distance…but I will start off by doing a sprint distance in September. It ends with a 5 k (3 miles) instead of a 10k…and the other two events are also chopped in half. I am pretty sure with my marathon history, I could complete one right now. But the idea is to be GOOD at it, so that’s my goal for training. And also just working on endurance & transitioning from one event to another. Anyway, to actually have a plan is thrilling because it gives my workouts real focus and & objective. It is more time consuming than training for a running event—even the logistics of getting to the gym, putting on my suit, waiting for a lane to swim in (when the old Chinese woman just loves walking backwards slowly in the water with her eyes closed for 30 minutes at a time), etc…make it a bit more complicated. But with the dissertation madness settling down, I think it’s a great opportunity to devote some time to this. Besides, it’s great fun & a challenge, which I crave.
So, anyway, my plan calls for 3 workouts per week in each: swim, bike, run. But not all of them are THAT long, so it isn’t too overwhelming (yet). I’m still going to my personal trainer right now, who focuses mostly on weight/resistance training—so it does feel like the schedule gets a little crowded. Also, my trainer KILLS me. If he wasn’t so nice, I might hate him. I couldn’t move my shoulders after Monday’s workout, and I tell him on Wednesday & of course he takes me almost immediately to the evil shoulder-working machine. To add to the humiliation of my actually grunting during the workout, he makes me run around the gym doing butt kicks—and the worse was yesterday---I had to do bear crawls and crab walks. What is this, field day? There are all these macho dudes at the machines, and I’m doing a crab walk around them? To get back at my trainer, no matter what the ridiculous instructions are, I claim that I have no idea how to do that. This forces him to demonstrate, so we both look like idiots. Anyway, I want a personal trainer for the rest of my life…what a motivator! I will have huge, muscular shoulders the next time you see me. Apparently, this is a good thing.
OH, something you should know about me: I am a SENSITIVE person. I used to think that I did a good job of hiding this, because I am even sensitive about being sensitive, but being that I’ve broken down at work multiple times, wept uncontrollably at my grandmother’s funeral, cried all the way home when a grocer told me I had more than 10 items…it wasn’t what she said, IT WAS THE TONE OF VOICE! Anyway, I often see it as one of my biggest weaknesses, because there are things that come along with being sensitive—namely, the tendency to overreact to every little move anyone makes. I can usually call myself on it after gaining perspective, and I try to let many things go.
OH, on another embarrassing note, I receive Ladies Home Journal. I subscribe to this magazine. Nothing wrong with that, if you’re a highly religious middle-age woman with children—as this seems to be their core audience. I didn’t mean to subscribe, but I do. Also, I read anything that’s in front of me, so I always tell myself I will throw it away, and I always end up reading every article. Well, it turns out there’s one called “Are you TOO sensitive?” And yes, it was an article about me. Instead of giving me tools to use to curb my sensitivity, it gave me reasons why it’s OK to be this way. It said it makes me have more empathy for others, more concern, less judgmental---because I know how I react to these things, so apparently I’m great at recognizing this tendency in others. I know that is why I am good with kids (one of the few things I’ll ever be certain that I am GOOD at), and I’ve always felt drawn to their own sensitivities and ‘mood swings’—and have the ability to recognize it & not blow it off. And it turns out, if Ladies’ Home Journal is right, that people who complain or make fun of my sensitivity actually appreciate that quality in me. A friend asked me, “What are you NOT sensitive to?” & I couldn’t answer that…but maybe instead of seeing it as something I have to overcome, I can learn to love that quality in myself. Yuck, this is way too schmaltzy. I must stop that magazine subscription. O! magazine is much more tough love.
Not much else going on. It is a simple life of work, rest, workout, watching reality tv, sleep. I’m looking forward to shaking it up a bit this weekend. Oh, and Happy Anniversary to my parents. You will not believe this, but they are celebrating their 36th year of being married!!! I didn’t know that was even possible. It’s offered me almost 29 years of a really stable home life, and I know I’ve been incredibly lucky. I one day hope to be married half as long as that, but to multiple people…just to keep the thrill alive! Also, I want to have fertility drugs when I try to have babies, so hopefully I can have sextuplets. What fun! You think six kids would be lots of work, but as I see it, lots of people to do my chores. I’m so sick of taking out my own trash. Is that considered a “litter”? If so, would there be a “runt” baby that we try to get rid of? Oh wait, I’m sensitive, I would never do that. But hopefully my husband, who will be incredibly insensitive to balance me out, would make it happen.
July 5th, 2007 Am I Really at Work?
Yes, it’s the day after the big 4th holiday, and I’m at work (at 8am). It’s really not so bad because we don’t have classes starting until next week, so it’s “planning” time---and catching up time.
I just spent the most amazing week back home in Texas. Well, a new home…my parent’s new “river home” in the hill country…located between Austin and San Antonio. It’s crazy nice, and the river is literally down some steps out back. I went tubing every single day, a surprise to me since I thought I would immediately be bored with the activity. Well, Texas has seen lots of flooding this year, so the river was moving pretty quickly most days—with lots of rapids and a frightening waterfall to keep me engaged. We took various family members/friends along with us each trip, so I felt like a tour guide by the end. I really enjoyed the forced relaxation of the whole experience, holding my beer (or diet orange soda), paddling, laughing, getting wet.
It was the first extended vacation I’ve had in awhile where I wasn’t working on school work. I really enjoyed myself—day after day of simple outings, board games, great meals cooked mostly outdoors, lots of playing with my nephew, sneaking into my brother’s local gym, and repeat. I was surrounded by family, which is my favorite place to be—there is an incredible safety net there giving me the freedom to be myself without much fear of being thrown out of the party.
Arriving back in L.A., I feel a definite need to cultivate that same kind of feeling out here. It is totally cliché, but even with this great job & opportunities that I’ve been aiming for for years, it doesn’t mean all that much without a true community of folks I can surround myself with that I feel totally comfortable around. I want simply to be happy rather than busy, grateful rather than searching, my guard down rather than closed off. This is not really a new desire, but as I find myself contrasting the way I have been living my day to day life verses how I lived in vacation---I realize I need a shift in attitude. And I feel that happening naturally. All it really is just a new perspective, a commitment to finding a sense of peace in my life.
Deep, huh. Not so much, really. I am just so ready to get out from the rock I’ve been under for the past year (very likely a place I needed to be to get the degree I will hopefully have in a couple of months) and have some fun—and not worry about how other people view my life, my choices, my path. So, in this spirit, I eagerly went to my friend’s pool party yesterday, and I had a great time. I relaxed into it, which was easy with the vacation vibe still in me, and I ended up playing marco polo & explaining that old game “Jaws” me and my brother and cousin used to play in our pool. While everyone claimed the game to be “too exhausting”, it was still good times. We drank too much, made plans to invest in some real estate, watched you tube videos, and laid out in the sun.
I went home around 7 and passed out before seeing any fireworks. Fireworks are actually not my favorite part of the holiday---and I’ve seen some great fireworks show (the best being that summer in New York…on the rooftop of a friend’s loft), and I could’ve walked a few blocks to catch the Culver City show, but I was sleeping instead.
I am just glad that it finally feels like summer, that I can run again (no more injury!), that my best friends are coming into town in a couple of weeks, etc. And I’m so glad I took a week off for family fun!
It would’ve been my grandmother’s 91st birthday on Saturday, and I can’t tell you how many times she has crossed my mind---not just lately, but since her passing. There is still a big part of me that misses her so much, and there is no getting around that.
I’m having my own birthday party in a couple of weeks. A private karaoke room, of course. Can’t wait! I’ll be the big 29! Have a great weekend, and I’m jealous if you’re off Thursday and Friday---not fair!!! I need MORE vacations!
June 15, 2007 Friday Night Daze
Busy teaching weeks leave me utterly exhausted on Friday evenings, in the best kind of way. So exhausted that I’m actually having a cup of coffee at 8:00pm just to keep from passing out too early. Also, I don’t usually post news clippings here, but this one I can’t stop giggling about (I usually do not find young children vomiting THAT funny). It is just the first part of the article...
No juice: Toddler served margarita in sippy cup
Manager at Calif. Applebee’s accidentally grabbed drink mix instead of juice
Updated: 3:59 p.m. PT June 15, 2007
ANTIOCH, Calif. - Kim Mayorga was confused when her 2-year-old started making funny faces and pushing away the apple juice he had ordered at Applebee’s. The explanation came when she opened the lid of the sippy cup and was hit by the smell of tequila and Triple Sec.
The restaurant staff accidentally gave Julian Mayorga a margarita Monday. He grew drowsy and started vomiting a few hours later and was rushed to the hospital.
*****
Don’t worry, turns out, he’s OK & Applebee’s paid the medical bills, and there are no hard feelings. I just love the writing---”was hit by the smell of tequila and Triple Sec.” and “gave Julian Mayorga a margarita Monday”---the alliteration is genius! You just know the person writing this was having a blast. Also, the kid had a margarita. If that had happened to my son (I don’t have a son, by the way), I would be in hysterics (AFTER he came home from the hospital, of course).
Anyway, I’m off subject here...subject being MY life. I’m trying to gear up and get myself out to a game night. Fridays are tough, though. I sort of want to just stay in, watch my Netflix movies, do some laundry and go to bed. Well, except for the laundry part.
I had a personal training session this week. I am not new to working out, but it’s the first time I’ve ever worked with a trainer--it was awesome. I see myself as pretty tough, but I was crying like a baby from The Biggest Loser, pleading--”I can’t do anymore!!!” What really sold me (besides the fact that my trainer is so cute AND a fencer)...was that he stretched me out afterwards. That is a first for me, but let me tell you--I’d be much more likely to view stretching as a necessary part of the workout if someone was doing it for me.
I’m still working on fixing my bike. I’ve talked to a few people in the know, and I think I can finish the repair on my own, like a true biker would. Or cyclist, as true bikers probably call themselves. I already want a really expensive road bike because I now understand why they pay the big bucks. But I’m determined to see my Target bike through the end (which may be next week, when the tires go flat on me again).
I have been so bummed about my running injuries, and this is the first time I’ve really been excited about workouts again---which is great. Even better, I get to start running again in 2 weeks! Now that I’m going to be mixing it in with the biking and swimming--combined with the stretching--I hope for fewer injuries in the future.
Officially not making it to game night. I can barely keep my eyes open as I type. Will update on things other than working out soon enough. Spurs won. Congrats, Toni. I am all for a Texas team winning...maybe someday it will be the Rockets.
June 11, 2007 A New Direction
So, Procrastination week was a moderate success. I did several things I’ve been meaning to do, but of course not everything--I was going to declare this week part II, but last week took way too much energy. So let’s calm down a little bit with the to do list!
I did get my bike fixed up (well, not anymore, a story that will follow), I joined Bally’s gym--4 floors and a pool! Plus I can work out at any of the gyms across the country, woo woo. I’ve decided to focus on completing a triathlon--the only way I can get over my sadness at not being able to race my summer 5 and 10ks. A few more weeks and i can start running again--woo hoo! Until then, let the biking and swimming begin. Lucky for me, a triathlon group is having a meeting within walking distance of me on wednesday--saying they are there to answer all of my questions. I have several, so let’s hope they are up to it.
I biked to work today--after doing some major biking this weekend in preparation. It was great on the way there--well, the roads here aren’t really conducive to bikes...so there was only an actually bike lane for a few miles (my trip downtown is about 11 miles). I just tried to be brave and confident, like I belonged on the roads...much like my own attempt at living life. Downtown it gets a little scary because I work in the warehouse district, and these guys don’t seem to abide by traffic laws. It takes about an hour, which is fine. I leave work early on my way home, thinking I’ll beat the traffic...and about 30 minutes into the ride home, feeling GREAT, my back tire blew. At first, I thought it was a small hole. My air pump didn’t seem to be working, but I saw an EZ Lube in the distance. I walked a few blocks, and they tried to fill it up, but it wasn’t working--I had blown the entire tube.
Now, this doesn’t come as a surprise to me. I don’t have a meltdown. If you have been keeping up with the past five years of my life, you know that stuff like this happens to me all the time. And I rarely choose the smart thing to do. I usually choose the solution requiring the most time and physical effort. So I just start walking it. WALKING THE BIKE--a good 5 miles to go. Now, if my foot didn’t have a stress fracture, I can bet you that I would’ve convinced myself to run the entire way, with the bike alongside of me. I try to think of any sporting goods stores or bike shops in the area, but I am in the GHETTO. After walking for a few minutes, a man--also with a bike, says “nice bike.” (GREAT line, by the way). I say “Thanks, it would be even better if the back tire worked.” (GREAT comeback.) We talk for a bit about the problem, and he tells me of some bike shop he knows of miles down the road. He tells me to hop on the bus at the corner & it will take me there (what? A bus? people do that?). I nodded and was just going to keep walking, but then he yells, “Here’s the bus!!!” & we both start running towards it with our bikes, and he decides to jump on, too. He shows me how to open the bike rack, put my bike on, pay the bus fare (I’m utterly lost). He also seems to know the bus driver, the sweetest woman I’ve met in awhile, and they argue about what I should do. Another bus rider chimes in, “Rick has a bike shop down the block. I don’t know if it’s open or not. He’s pretty selective with his clients.” Sure enough, we past Rick’s, and there’s a gate covering the storefront--and then someone mentions another shop further down. As we pass by this one, though, another passenger notes that it’s a Jewish neighborhood and they are closed today (??). Bikeology’s doors are in fact shut. They finally decide just to get me closer to home, and throw me off at a random stop--telling me to wait for “Green bus #3”.
So, I know where I am. I’m pretty familiar with most L.A. neighborhoods by now, but I can’t tell you how strange it is--just me and a broken bike. I called my brothers and some friends, trying to see if maybe they could google bike shops and find one in this new area...because there were no green busses in sight. Finally, after a half hour wait, one pulls up. I use my bike rack skills to make it happen--getting the thing on the rack is much harder than you would imagine--and the bus driver asks where I’m going. I tell him two major streets in my neighborhood, and he says he WILL be stopping there--but it will be a long time. SO instead, I wait until we get fairly close to my house, get off before we turn some other direction--and walk my bike the rest of the way home.
The great part was, at no part of this journey was I stressed out or concerned about anything. While I’m often hesitant to reach out to people, once they made the first move, I thought, “Well, just let them take care of me.” (If I could only do this people in my life besides the bus riders!) I left work early, and got home--2 1/2 hours later, but still not much later than I usually get home if I had left my normal time. I felt like I had gone on such a TRIP. And I actually missed my car...listening to music in the car, the ease of it all. Someone commented “wow, your first day riding to work & you get a flat tire!”--but i just see it as getting over my fear of what COULD happen if i take my bike--now i know i can just jump on a bus! which seem to be everywhere! And people are generally eager to help. I hope to get in the habit of riding at least a couple of times a week...Mondays are easy because I can be prepared on Sunday night for the hassle of packing a backpack, etc. I still got 1 1/2 hours of riding in, which has left me dead.
I was going to ride on over to the gym to do some swimming tonight, but instead, I’ll try to do a little bike repair of my own.
What a Monday! The weekend was great. It was my first really quiet weekend in months, and I SO needed it. I went to a bar for a margarita (hello!), rode my bike to the beach, watched some boxing on saturday night, caught two documentaries on Sunday, swam at the gym,...all weekends should be so chill. I’m finding it’s less about the activity and more about the attitude, though--so I hope to cultivate this ‘chill’ attitude ALL summer long--regardless of the itinerary.
I’ve heard there will be multiple BBQs happening when I head back to Texas for a week (very soon!). This will jump start the summer in a most lovely way.
I hope everyone is well. My brother just celebrated a wedding anniversary! Congrats.
June 4, 2007 Procrastination Week
I have declared this week Procrastination Week, not because I’m procrastinating, but because I’m taking care of all the business I’ve been putting off for MONTHS. Months, I tell you. And yes, I was going to have it be last week...but you guessed it: PROCRASTINATED. LOL * infinity and beyooooond. Man, you know what--five and 1/2 years of this site, and I just keep getting wittier.
I’ve been pretty out of it the past few weeks--or can we say the past year? I can not believe I’m the same girl who once played in two softball leagues at the same time, took repelling lessons, organized parties--and now I’m lucky to get out of the house for a movie on the weekend. You really can’t do everything, unfortunately. Oh wait, I just went to Denver last weekend, to the Tribeca Film Fest last month...not to mention a trip to Vegas in February...well, I’ve fared pretty well, considering I’m a mildly depressed “desperado” as Johnny Cash sings to me (too often for my own good). Actually, I have new depressing music--Patty Griffin. She’s amazing.
So I’m starting to shake the funk I’ve been in (thanks to my visit to Denver & my new obsession with rollerblading until the sun goes down), and it feels really nice. I have more good news. I’m engaged! No, I’m not, stop jumping up and down--I’m going to be teaching at Cal State this summer! In a couple of weeks! A class called “Creative Drama in the Elementary Classroom.” I’ll be working with 40+ teachers in training, showing them how to incorporate drama into their classrooms. Not only do I get to bring back my “Professor Messer” joke, but I’ll be spending the summer teaching K-8th grade at Inner-City Arts & college students!!! I knew those months of delivering frozen food to celebrities would pay off. Thank you, Los Angeles!
My teaching is really great this session--while writing the dissertation, it was mostly me teaching the same curriculum--but now i’m shaking it up--and every class is doing brand new stuff. It makes the days fly by--in challenging, creative, fun ways. I am at a good place right now with my work, and I’m about to start thinking about my defense in August--the final piece of the puzzle before I start forcing you to call me Dr.
In not so great news, I found out I have a mild stress fracture in my foot. The good news is my doc says it will get better all on its own & i only have to wait 3-4 more weeks before I can start to run again. I am glad that it will be back to normal soon, in the meantime, I’ve been going nuts trying to keep my cardio interesting. I’m joining a gym this week, where you can see me going nuts on the elliptical, trying to replicate that runner’s high. Or maybe you’ll just see me smoking a joint outside the gym. Not really.
Thanks so much for all the kind words about Grandmother. It really helped me through the past couple of weeks--I’ve been wearing her diamond ring around town--it goes well with my ridiculously huge Nike sports watch.
Well, I can’t spend all night updating this thing. I have things to do! Like pay my taxes! Just kidding feds! 100% joking.
May 21, 2007 Grandmother
As you have read on the opening page, my grandmother passed away this past Thursday. I have been sitting here for about half an hour trying to think of something eloquent to say.
I flew to Denver on Friday and drove into Midland with my big brother. The next day, as I drove up to Grandmother’s house, I suddenly froze in the car--unable to make my way inside. If you know Grandmother’s house, you know what I’m talking about. She’s been in that house as long as I have been alive, and her spirit is in every shelf, every hallway, kitchen cabinets, bedroom--even the backyard. Grandmother liked to greet people as they entered her house, even though you were always welcome just to step right in. She would open that screen door up and welcome you with a smile and a heartfelt hug.
It was such an example of how her life touched everyone around her. Immediate love and open arms. Everyone had their own special relationship with Grandmother, and I can only speak of my experiences. She has been, in addition to my mom and dad, the guiding force in my life. When I think about the people who have gotten me to the place I am, who have raised me with the values I have--those are the three people I think of. As a kid, I often spent the night with Grandmother. She would have my favorite--jello with whipped cream--for dessert, and we played the card game Skip Bo into the evening before falling asleep in the same bed. I woke up to cinnamon toast and Saturday morning cartoons or church on Sundays followed by a meal at Grandy’s.
When I was in high school and we moved away from Midland, Grandmother was gracious enough to let me live with her in the summers (and part of one school year) so I could be a part of the community theatre group. I KNOW I’m not the most gracious house guest, but we still managed to have a real blast. Me and grandmother share a similar sarcasm and wit--which would keep us laughing into the evenings. There are too many memories to count here--we watched many, many movies on her TV, caught Days of Our Lives when we could, meals at Sonic and Rosa’s, 4 o’clock snacks (food is very important to us, if you can’t tell--and the 4 o’clock snack is a tradition I’ve maintained over the years), a knock on my bedroom door in the mornings--with a cold glass of orange juice, leaving the light on at night, greeting me at the door when I come in at my midnight curfew, and on and on. She had this amazing ability to listen to me and make me feel like the only other person in the world. After I left for college, she started with the letters. I kept them all and have a huge stack next to me right now. They are filled with thoughts on the weather, problems with the neighbors, and newspaper clippings she thought I might need. She was the last person I actually wrote real letters to--in the mail! (imagine that).
I did get out of the car Saturday morning and made it into Grandmother’s house --and of course broke down every five minutes. Because as much as we celebrated her life this weekend--an amazing, extraordinary life, the truth is--I miss her so much already. I missed telling her my luggage was lost, and I had to go to Target to buy my funeral clothes at 8am the morning of the funeral (she was most certainly looking down on me and having a good laugh about that one). There was such an hole left that I wasn’t prepared for, especially as I drove off last night and my dad and Aunt Don took Grandmother’s role of standing outside and waving to me as I left.
The memorial service was really lovely, exactly how Grandmother would’ve wanted it--and she was in fine form with her hot pink suit. I of course, being an overly sensitive one, couldn’t maintain any kind of composure. But I did notice ALL of the people there--and how touched each one was--with their own mound of memories and connections to grandmother that are private and unknowable to anyone but the two of them. Because Grandmother had that ability to make really personal, one on one connections with people.
There was a talk of “legacy” in the service, and Grandmother did leave us that. She has raised five children who have emphasized the importance of family, something I thought everyone in the world did until I moved away and realized what a unique gift that was. She created a space for us to gather--not just a physical space, but a feeling of acceptance and welcome that invited us in. As a result, I not only know all of my cousins, but I consider each one a great friend. It has made my support system--the whole family’s support system--so wide reaching and full of nets to catch you if you fall. It has been an amazing lesson in my own life, and one that I intend to pass on. I have the gift--not only of this incredibly loving Grandmother--but of aunts, uncles, cousins, parents, siblings. I talk to both brothers multiple times through the week, and my parents, too--they are my closest friends. I know Grandmother played an integral role in that.
I think of how blessed I am that I was able to have such a deep relationship with my Grandmother. The poem she requested to have read at her service ends with the line “miss me, but let me go.” Even in dying, she of course has a big lesson for me to learn--me, who holds onto everything--has to cherish the memories, recognize her spirit is always with me, continue to live my life based on the principles that she and my family have taught me--and let her go.
I love you, Grandmother!
May 12, 2007 New York City and stuff
OK. I officially have free time in my life for the first time in...forever. It will be interesting to see what kind of trouble I get myself into. I’m a bit nervous.
I went to New York at the end of April & had a great time. It was a really short trip, but I got to see about five films as part of the Tribeca Film Fest. I love film festivals, and one day I hope for an all access pass to one of them. There is such a risk involved because you really have no idea if a movie will be cool or crap or a little of both. Me and my friend Graham spent an entire day watching movies all over the city. We saw famous people and sat through many Q and A’s. The best time I had was watching a documentary about double dutch jump-roping competitions. I thought I liked Jamie Kennedy’s documentary on heckling, but at the Q and A--decided I am just extremely annoyed by both him and the director. I enjoyed watching short films...I wish we had more of an opportunity to see groupings of short films. It’s a whole other art form.
I did that, and got to do my two favorite NYC runs: Central Park (with Daryl, who kept me moving FAST, thanks!) and the West Side path (way too much construction still going on here, though). I had several great brunches & spent a whole afternoon with Chuck--we went to the wax museum, which I was very impressed with. I am most impressed with the person who originally thought it was a good idea to make wax celebrities. Because you know all his friends probably laughed at him. Oh, and I just found out Chuck and Doug are coming to L.A. in July--more specifically, during my birthday! yes. Party time.
The musical I assistant directed opened last night to a sold out crowd. The actors are so talented, it was pretty much a joy to watch them every night. But I’m ready to NOT be pulling out 14 hour days.
I am so eager to learn how to relax again. I mean, I’m usually an expert at it, but school and dissertation-writing do funny things to you. I hope I recover. I plan on spending the whole weekend just hanging out with myself, doing all that cleaning/laundry/etc. I’ve been avoiding, watch those netflix movies that have been sitting on my coffee table for a month, and getting outside. I can roller blade out to the beach, and it’s a great day to do it! Also, I found out I’ll be in Texas for my 4th attempt at the Luling Watermelon 5k this June, so I must enter heavy duty training mode. That girl that stole it from me last year will be sorry. So maybe some running today, too? Thanks, Dad--the new fancy insoles are amazing! So much stability in my feet now. Hopefully this will transfer to the rest of my life.
Hope everyone is well!
April 23, 2007 Oops. Where did the past month go?
My mind has been so scattered, I forgot to update this thing. Also, I have an extreme aversion to typing after that dissertation. The good news: my committee is signing off on the paper & it is turned into the graduate studies office at NYU. It is not the last step in the process. That will be happening on August 20th, as I defend the dissertation in front of my committee and outside readers. My fear of speaking out loud in a non-sarcastic articulate manner necessitates much rehearsal of this ‘defense’--but I’m giving myself until June 1st to start working on that. If I do pass, I will have about 9 months to plan THE graduation party of a century in New York. It will be just like My Sweet Sixteen on MTV. Yes, Busta WILL be performing & i will also be making several costume changes. Let me know if you want V.I.P. treatment. I’ll see if I can hook you up.
For some reason, while finishing my dissertation, I got myself involved with a musical that rehearses almost every day of the week...in addition to working more hours. So, what I’m really wanting right now is just some off time. The musical is actually really great & it’s a fun group of people--so it’s still a good time. I will be getting free time in precisely 3 weeks or so. I am calling that (May 11th) the official beginning of my summer of fun in the sun. And I intend to spend most of my free time outside. I’m not sure what I’ll be doing, but I’m so sick of being indoors. In great news, I get to spend Memorial Day in Denver hangin’ with my bro’ and his clan. And in June, I’m spending a whole week in my parent’s brand spakin’ new home in the hill country--right along the river...where folks go ‘tubin’--the ultimate Texas form of relaxation.
My little brother came to visit a couple of weeks ago (the same week the dissertation was due...so thanks T for putting up with that madness). We had such a blast--watched 3 movies in the theater, had a couple of great meals & saw the Clippers kill the Lakers (though too bad they didn’t make playoffs this year...go ROCKETS). It was so cool to have Tom around & he is the most easygoing person ever--I learn to be a little more easygoing myself when i’m by his side.
I’ve actually ventured away from home this past weekend, so I am still capable of being social. Friday night went to my favorite dance night--Pop Starz & had a blast. Saturday night I went to a New Year’s themed party (yes, in late April). I got to throw confetti on myself & didn’t have to sweep it up. Plus, there was a keg & ice cream cake, so I would say the party was certainly a success. I look forward to some more house party adventures as I rejoin the outside world.
My knee is finally much better, and I’ve been able to run like a normal person this past week. I can’t tell you how happy I am after the run...i forget how much it peps me up--unlike any other form of exercise. Most importantly, it means I can start runnin’ those spring 5k/10ks I love.
I am still behind on a million things I’m supposed to do. The last few weeks, I’ve been trying to get through the day & so have been unable to see much beyond 24 hours. Oh, I am going to NYC this weekend! It’s a short trip, but need to do some NYU stuff--see a few Tribeca Film Fest films (thanks G! literally, his name starts with a G, he’s not a gangsta...unless science is a gang), see as many of my friends as I can manage, run in my old neighborhood, etc...take two red eye flights. it is all quite fast-paced.
I got a new laptop (a mac...i can hardly believe it) & will be doing a new website, etc. to show off my mac skills...after I actually acquire more mac skills. My family now has one, so I can video chat with my brothers and my parents! It’s amazing!
So, I think that catches you up with the month. I am feeling slightly more grounded in the city. I have been hanging out with my friend Michael, who I met in NYC & have since gotten in touch with here...and he has become a really great friend in L.A.--sometimes the city is so spread out, it’s difficult to find friends you see on a weekly/ bi-weekly basis (outside of work). He has been there to hear my dissertation complaints & console me when I lose at Rummikub & not make fun of my slurpee addiction. He is just an all-around entertaining force in my life. And finally I got to see Wayne the other day...it has been like a month. Hope to catch up with others soon...and look forward to a more social next few months. And by social, I mean see more movies.
Hope everyone is doing well. I will take some pictures soon, I promise.
March 24, 2007 My Weekend
Wow. I finally got the last draft into the committee on Wednesday, so I’ve given myself 3 days off from that dissertation stuff & will hopefully return to it at some point today. I will hear in the next week whether I can continue to reach for the April deadline, or I’ll have to wait until the October deadline. Either way, it feels good not to be reading through that thing all hours of the day. I think it damaged my brain.
This is a great weekend because I have absolutely no plans! Some people might fear weekends like that, but it has come at exactly the right moment. I have to catch up on some curriculum stuff for work & do some work on the dissertation, but other than that--I’m laying low.
I just went for a long bike ride to the beach. Unfortunately, I know nothing about bikes. I should not be going for long rides without any experience. As soon as I get all the way out to LAX (the airport), I realize I have a flat tire. I have no idea what to do & am thinking it will take hours to walk this bike home. Luckily, in about 15 minutes I see a rider pumping up a tire on his bike, and he fills mine up as well. He tells me to get home as soon as I can. Unfortunately, I’m still a good 1/2 hour from home. The last 15 minutes I’m riding on a completely flat tire, which can’t be good for the bike--but I was kind of curious to see what would happen. Would it explode? Would the wheel spin off? I ended up only having to walk it home the last 5 minutes of the trip, but now of course, I have no idea what to do next. Could someone who rides bikes tell me?
I start rehearsals on Tuesday assistant directing for a musical. This will keep me busy until mid-May. I kind of wanted my life back, but I figure this will keep me out of trouble & hopefully will be fun. I’m not a great assistant, though, so maybe I’ll learn something.
My little brother is coming to visit in a week, and I cannot wait! He is driving here & will only be here mid-week, so that’s a little weird--but we’ll make it work. We’re talking about a Clippers game and Disneyland, so who knows? I’m looking forward to having him here.
I am still not in a great mood. I keep waiting for that to happen, and my usual cure-all: lots of running...has to wait a few more weeks until my knee is better. I just need to get a life. I have been in school for so long, and it is hard to believe that I’m still here. When did I become such a nerd, and why can’t I seem to escape? Oh, and apologies to any calls or emails I haven’t answered lately. I’ll get on that this week. Have a good one!!!
March 18, 2007 Being an Adult Sucks: Dissertation Depression
So, this is the worst dissertation weekend to date. I left the house only for working out and getting groceries. That’s it. I even limited my T.V. time and spent way too many hours right here in front of the computer. Oh, dissertation, I’m sick of you already. I’m sending in hopefully a final version of the draft...cross your fingers: tomorrow evening. It just seems endless--the revisions. The formatting. All of it. I think I might have gone a little insane. I also decided to drink coffee, something I haven’t done since August. It was not a good idea. Luckily, my friend M. (i never know when i can use names. must ask permission first.) came over yesterday & provided me with company and laughs & made fun of me and my dissertation notes spread all over the walls and floor. We’ve only really hung out after I started on the dissertation, and I told him how I would revert to my happy self once this was over. He’ll be shocked that I can actually leave the house & participate in conversations without complaining about this paper. We managed to watch SNL even though it was painfully unfunny.
Besides a short call to my big brother, that was the extent of my weekend. I haven’t done my planning for work tomorrow, or the meeting following work. I have finally stopped drinking coffee, and I’m hoping to actually sleep tonight. I swear, this is one of the last complaints I’ll give you. But I am SO sick of being stuck in my own head. And eating toaster waffles for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
I was going so stir-crazy that I bought a bicycle this week instead of going to kickboxing (though I might have to go to kickboxing this week, so i can kick and punch my frustrations away). I needed something that was pure fun & involved the outdoors & a workout, so a bike was a logical step. I got a cheepo one, and if I like riding--I might spring for a nicer road bike later on & do one of those triathalons. My big brother knows the struggle I went through in actually getting the new bike in my car and home again...it’s too humiliating to share. But I’ve been out on it twice, and I really love it. The bike path by me goes all the way out to the beach, so it will be great to go on long rides this summer.
The Rockets smashed the 76rs this afternoon. 124-74. INSANE. I hope this is a sign of good things to come in the playoffs. How are your NCAA picks holding up? I’m currently in third place in my pool (tied with about 3 others), but you know---anything can happen. My two winning teams are still in there, so there’s hope.
That’s all I got today. I’m officially miserable. I still need about 2 more hours of work tonight, though, so i’m signin’ off. Send me happy emails. please.
March 11, 2007 Post Marathon Depression and Springing Forward
Yes, it’s the horrible week after the marathon, where I roam through the world aimlessly, wondering what else there is to live for. OK, it’s not that bad, but running outside is what maintains my relatively happy mood. I was able to do some Tae Bo this week & actually ran for 30 minutes yesterday, but the knee injury will take a couple of weeks to completely get over--so I am trying not to run on it at all. I’ve found my best option for kickboxing classes, and I’m going to head over there tomorrow for hopefully my first day. They offer classes four days a week, so I’m looking forward to having an alternative workout in the schedule. I am only doing it for a month because it costs money & I’m sure by April I’ll be ready to be outside all of the time anyway. Also, I got a gig assistant directing a musical in Hollywood! Cool! It’s my good friend and ex-boss’ show...so it will be fun to work with him for a bit on a regular basis. I’m trying to work it out, so I’ll have enough time to finish the dissertation before I start filling up ALL of my spare time.
Anyway, it is really dissertation crunch time & it is driving me absolutely mad. I like to get out of the house as much as possible, but I’ve been forced to live this total insular life. OK, so maybe going to Vegas and running marathons wouldn’t be considered totally insular, but you know what I mean. I miss spending my Saturday mornings finding new mountains to hike or hanging out at the beach for hours. I will be so grateful for this next draft to be in the hands of the committee...and then i will wait to hear the official word about whether I can make the April deadline or not. I printed out and read through the whole thing, so I did notice some progress. Won’t you be glad when I’m done and not writing about it every week? I think so.
So, I went to game night last night. It was absolutely exactly the kind of evening I needed. It was at Wayne’s apartment, and he has this new $4000 toilet seat w/remote. He got it at some celebrity event. It is the most frightening thing you have ever seen. It squirts water, blow dries, warms the seat...and other things I can’t mention on the internet. I was entranced but actually too scared to try it just yet. There is always lots of giggling when someone is in the bathroom, so it can’t be all bad.
I’m so glad we’ve sprung forward. I like when it gets dark really late. It feels like summer. OK, I didn’t like that I got home & it was all of a sudden 3am, but it worked itself out ok.
March 5, 2007 Marathon Report
Thanks to all of you for the well wishes on Sunday’s L.A. Marathon. Phew! What a run. I took longer than expected. I started the race thinking, “slow down. have a good time.” & decided that 10 minute miles would be just the pace to let me enjoy the thing. And I was. Early on, though, about mile 4, I could feel my knee...not a pain necessarily, but definitely something that could develop. I took some advil, and it was great until mile 19, when no amount of pain killer was going to help. I’ve had various kind of aches/pains before: calves, feet, ankles, shoulder, stomach...but rarely my knee. There was a realization that I could really do nothing about it--I would run as far as I could, and then my knee felt like it was actually going to buckle & I was going to fall down...so I would start walking again. And the changing of speed...from walk to the run...is what was really painful.
At first, I was of course discouraged because I felt great otherwise...the best marathon spirits I’ve been in that late in the race. But it wasn’t like I was going to break any course record of mine anyway, and I looked around and saw so many others doing the same painful walk/run last 6 mile finish. So I shrugged it off, turned up my ipod & walked/ran as fast as I could. About mile 22 I turned on Eminem’s “Til I Collapse” & listened to it for the last 50 minutes of the race. He was yelling at me to not be a quitter...to run until I collapse. I don’t know if doctors would agree, but man, Eminem can be quite the motivator when he’s screaming in your ear like that. It really helped me pick up the pace the last 2 miles & I finished in 4:43 (a far cry from my goal of 4-4:30...but hey, it’s just 15 minutes than my original “slower pace”--so not bad for walking, stopping to stretch, etc. during those last miles). I was most amazed by the fact that I wasn’t really bothered by this set back. My previous L.A. marathon I was in tears because I couldn’t keep my pace. I guess since this is my fifth, I’ve realized that it is one of many races in my life...better that I have fun and enjoy it than beat myself up! Also, who cares? I finished!
Time and knee issues aside, what an awesome run! There were 25,000 runners...this is LOTS, even for a marathon. They changed the course this year, so we started near Universal Studios, ran down the hollywood hills, right into Hollywood/Highland intersection (where the Oscars are), down through some posh neighborhoods, into South Central, through east L.A., and finally over a bridge (that offered some amazing views: mountains, Hollywood sign, downtown, the ocean) leading into downtown, where we finished. I still wish the course went through at least a couple of different neighborhoods (we were in the ‘warehouse district’ for miles...this is not like the trendy meatpacking district in Manhattan...this is really a desolate patch of L.A. filled with actual warehouses)...but I’m amazed that the organizers can pull off an event this big with few issues. The crowds (both running and watching) were amazing. It took a good 2 miles to get out of the congestion of people running (typical L.A. traffic)...and even towards the end, I was still running near at least 20 people. The cheering crowds were a constant throughout. Residential areas used water hoses to spray us down, bands played at most miles, loads of water/ gatorade stations. Most of the bands were pretty bad except for one singing that “A little bit of [enter female’s name here] in my life, a little bit of [another female’s name] ...” well, i don’t really know the words, but i came up to them, started screaming and pointing to my own name & sure enough, they started singing “a little bit of Kristy”...awesome.
The best part was that my mom borrowed my car & drove around L.A. & met me six different times during the race. She was my own pit crew. I ended up carrying nothing, and she provided me with any advil, gels, water, etc. I might be needing. She charged my ipod, even. And of course screamed my name & somehow got everyone next to her to join in. I could not have finished the race without her there, and it was such a fun experience--telling both sides of the stories post-race. Mom let me pick dinner, and I chose Lola’s--a great, very L.A., very dim restaurant. I had a lemon drop martini (ok, i really wanted a beer), shrimp stir fry & drum roll...a platter of homemade cookies...straight from the oven. Perfection.
So, another marathon. It was good doing the L.A. run again. It strangely makes me feel like I’m home when I’m doing a big race through the city like that. I can’t tell you the feeling of looking around you & seeing all these folks trying just as hard as you to get to the finish line...from all walks of life, all ages...and I’ve talked before about road races really being a community event--well, the big city marathon is an awesome example of this community. It is one of the things I crave most--that feeling combined with the mental, physical, emotional challenge of the run itself...I can’t even tell you what joy it brings me. It takes me completely out of my regular everyday life for a weekend & now, as usual, returning is a bit of a shock. I’m hoping my knee is better soon, but I’m also feeling that maybe a marathon every OTHER year might be better for me (i just ran vegas a year ago!). But I’m sure when I’m completely better, I’ll totally forget I said that. For now, though, it’s time to investigate my kick boxing career.
In regular news, there is now country music on Los Angeles radio again! 105.1. I almost cried when I heard it. And it’s really good, too. What else? I’m sore and mentally worn out as well. I will tell you next time about another crying episode I had in a meeting at work. Seriously, can I stop being SO sensitive? The more I try, the more I fail. OK. I had a GREAT weekend. Thanks Mom for flying in for the marathon! Couldn’t have done it without you. And Dad for that wonderful post-marathon song. Note to John: the toenail thing, it was an illusion. Still there.
February 26, 2007 Oscar Thoughts and Vegas And Stuck on the Freeway
It is early Monday morning, and I am still trying to get over my Vegas trip. Not ready to be with 5th graders. Oh well. I had to write right away before I’m sick of Oscar coverage & give you my own thoughts. Well, let’s start by congratulating myself- I tied for first place for most correct Oscar pics at the Oscar party. This happened back in 2005, and I’m pretty sure I came close in 06, but everyone was so angry at me for voting for the winning picture--I think they kicked me out before we counted our ballots. Well, this year was pretty boring I thought (not the party, the show). I was angry about Eddie Murphy not winning, mostly because I’m a huge Eddie Murphy fan. My dad introduced me to his fine work when I was a kid & we would stay up watching Saturday Night Live. Eddie did Buckwheat and at the time...the “Buckwheat is dead” episode of SNL changed my world forever. And he really WAS great in Dreamgirlsso much depth in that role. And best song NOT going to “Listen”???? I have been running to that song for months now...non-stop. I can’t imagine ever saying the same about that Melissa Etheridge environmental crap. I don’t want to hear an angry environment song when I run. I want to hear Beyonce going CRAZY. Well, I guess that is pay-back for voting for “It’s Hard out here for a pimp” last year. But seriously, both songs (Pimp and Listen) are integral parts of their movies...centerpieces almost. Yes, I’m slightly bitter. But I am happy for the Departed wins...didn’t think it was a perfect movie, but it was the best one nominated. Will Farrell/Jack Black/John C. Reilly had the funniest bit last night...then it got boring fast. Ellen did an OK job, Jerry Seinfeld is still a comedy GOD (when is he going to film a new HBO special???), and the speeches were mostly pretty dull. I’m sure we were all nervous about Forest getting up to give his speech (is he going to make sense? can he control his droopy eye?), and he did great I thought--mostly cause he mentioned Texas and South Central L.A. in the same sentence. I could’ve done about all the talk about his next lives, but it was the most touching speech of the evening. And of course Marty (do we all call him that now?) getting his award. He’s such a likable guy & was so obviously giddy about getting the statue. All in all, an Oscar night to forget. But did I mention I won (tied) for first place?!?! I like to win.
OK, am back from work...had an adventure of sorts on my way home. I work in the ghetto of downtown, so I am near several major freeways all running into one another about the same time. I am driving in my Mustang & about the time I get to the huge intersection of freeways, my car starts shaking and making some extremely loud racket. At first, I thought someone was doing a drive by. Then I thought I had a crazy flat tire. Whatever it was, I had to get off the road, but of course the shoulder isn’t a real shoulder...only about 1/2 of one, so my car is squashed into this tiny space...with cars and trucks going by at top speeds, literally shaking my car. I was sitting there really having no idea what to do next. I had no space to open my door and get out of my car to see what had happened. There were no holes in the traffic that allowed me to attempt to get back on the road & take the next exit. Finally, I squirmed out of the passenger side & found enough room to get to my trunk outside. The tires all seem intact and properly inflated. I look under the car and discover the problem. Before getting on the freeway, there was a plastic bag in the middle of the on ramp that I couldn’t avoid. I figure, “Oh well, it’s just a plastic bag.” Well, it got stuck under my car and all kinds of wrapped up in my business...apparently, causing it to make ungodly noises as I drove. My sporty car is extremely low to the ground, though, so I couldn’t actually reach underneath. In my time of panic, I call my little brother. I’m not sure what kind of advice he could’ve given me other than what he did: “Get off the road. Get the bag out.” Somehow, it was comforting enough & I waited a good 10 minutes until traffic cleared for long enough to enter back onto the freeway. And there came the terrible shaking and noise again. I could only go about 20 mph without the noise being out of control & I feared the whole car exploding or something. There is of course no immediate exit, just another ramp leading to another freeway, but I take it, make the first exit (with a swarm of angry drivers behind me, honking furiously...as if I didn’t realize I was driving so slow and making SO much noise)...and still have no idea how to fix the problem. I turn into the L.A. convention center & luckily see these two guys who work there--looking VERY bored, probably talking about last night’s Oscars. I’m still on the phone with my little brother, who has finally stopped laughing from hearing the loud racket & picturing me driving down the L.A. freeway. I get off the phone, jump out of the car, screaming at the men and waving my arms, “I need your help!!!” It was a little on the dramatic side (as if I was on fire or in labor), but it worked & they actually said, “You’ve come to the right place!” They had me drive up on a curb & then they fished out about a zillion huge pieces of plastic bag. At one point, they said, “This is some plastic bag. Looks like a mattress cover.” & kept finding MORE pieces. It was ridiculous, but soon I was on my way again. I thanked them over and over again, saying, “You saved me!!!” It still smells a little like burnt popcorn when I drive the car (I will take it in to be serviced, Dad), but man, am I grateful for those dudes and my brother, all of them getting such a kick out of my situation.
ANYWAY, sorry to get sidetracked. I went to Vegas last weekend! It was awesome. I met my girls from NYC, Annette and Tammie (Annette had never been to Vegas, making it all the more fun) & we had a blast. We stayed at the Luxor, which I stayed at before. Ideally, I would like to be mid-strip (the Bellagio, Paris, Aladdin area being my favorite), but we had my car--so used it whenever we had to make the LONG trip down the strip. I have only recently begun to build close female friendships (besides my mom and other relatives). I have always felt more at home with boys because I grew up with brothers & even my mom is not real girly, so it just felt more natural for me. So, I was eager to see what a girly vacation was like. Luckily, these girls are not so girly, so we didn’t spend much time getting ready or anything. We DID spend time shopping, which is not my favorite thing. We went to the outlets, and I immediately headed to Nike and Adidas...and we all ended up buying shoes at Converse, so like I said...not a real girly group. It was me that suggested the male strip show, though (really trying to take full advantage of an all girls trip). It’s called “American Storm” & I highly recommend it. It’s the alternative the the Australian version “Thunder from Down Under.” They look really gay in that picture, so I voted for the American one. Also, it was cheaper. Well, apparently, the Discovery channel has taken the same interest in the show & was there filming us that evening. I will tell you when it airs because it could be potentially the most embarrassing footage of me to date. I was blushing through most of it, but I was also clapping and laughing really loudly. Quite entertaining. They had a whole cowboy stripper number, dancing to that Big and Rich song, “Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy.” It was a highlight. They didn’t strip down all the way, don’t worry. They did sit on some laps and gyrate, but I stuck myself into a corner. We went to the Bellagio brunch buffet, which is highly recommended & with reason. It’s amazingly good buffet food, and it came with endless champagne. We sat at brunch for 3 hours. We also gambled--slots only--I definitely lost more than I won, but I finished by winning $60 at a Wheel of Fortune slot. Family Feud is no good to me anymore. It’s sad, but sometimes you just have to move on--just cause a slot was good to you way back when does not mean you need to maintain any kind of loyalty to it. So, I moved on to Deal or No Deal, but it wasn’t much better...more of a rebound slot.
The last day in Vegas was rough. The girls were catching a red-eye & I was driving back at 11pm to Los Angeles. We thought it SOUNDED like a smart idea because we wouldn’t have to pay for another hotel night. It was not a smart idea. After brunch, we went to the Aladdin shops...where I knew the famous Fat Tuesdays would be sitting. After some shopping, we made it there & I forced everyone to have the most potent and tasty drink ever: the 190 Octane. I have raved about this drink before. One Vegas, me, Chuck and my friend Tom had one in the afternoon, and we were buzzed for the entire day. Well, I forgot about champagne brunch & that we already had some alcohol in the system. I have talked the drink up so much, though, that we go for it. I stick to the smallest size, minus the extra shot that I convince the girls to get. We sit on the stools, enjoying the frozen drink, having fun...it’s about time to go when I realize I don’t think I can walk. Well, turns out I can but I realize immediately that I have gone one 190 octane too far. I am in bad shape. Now, I am not a loud, angry, belligerent drunk. After drinking too much, I get really quiet & just want the feeling to go away as soon as possible. I try to head directly to my bed, but in this situation--we’re already checked out & have no beds! We find a bar/lounge connected to a restroom in another part of the mall, where we sit down & I cannot seem to move or talk or open my eyes. I keep saying, “Don’t talk to me. Just give me ten more minutes.” I make several trips to the bathroom, literally sprawled out on the stall floor, my head on the toilet...remembering back to some awful party in undergrad. I remain silent in the lounge, falling asleep on the couch, when we decide it’s time to go (and by “we decide,” I mean “the owner was kicking me out”) At this point, I tell them I need a hotel room and I want to go to bed. We are walking out when we see a sports bar & decide it will be good to get some food in me. I order a club sandwich, no bacon, & gulp the whole thing down in about 5 minutes--and am literally feeling perfectly OK. It was the strangest afternoon ever. At this point, Tammie is now feeling the alcohol, and now she is not feeling well. Anyway, I am on top of the world just because I am no longer under the 190 octane influence & am very content with a cup of hot tea. We walk around for awhile & I take them to the airport & I drive home. It was probably the longest day of my life, but the whole trip was well worth it. And I stand by the drink, but now realize it must be the ONLY alcohol of the day. I don’t get it. I watched girl after girl order HUGE mugs with this stuff in it, and me, the big talker, was knocked to the ground with a small serving. Such a light weight.
Anyway, that was my short but sweet Vegas trip, and we are already trying to get together a summer trip there--where we can lounge by the pools and visit the Liberace museum. I put up with most of the girly talk (an amazing amount of boy talk, fashion do’s and don’ts, etc)...except for the make up talk (eyeshadow, etc.), when I zoned off and daydreamed about new possibilities for themed hotels. Girls do lots of telling you how great you are & how the men in your life, or your bosses, or whomever the ‘other’ is does not deserve you, though, which guys don’t do much. Mostly, guys just make fun of one another & eat. So, I am still learning to be supportive and sensitive & keep the insults to a minimum.
Not much else. Still trying to recover. Wayne filmed the internet video...so as soon as it’s online, I’ll tell you. I look like a complete weirdo, but hey, anything to get a laugh. I might try to do some video on here someday. I may be upgrading my computer & going for a mac book soon...overhaul this web design software & have a more interactive site. Big dreams...we’ll see after that PhD thing happens.
Marathon on Sunday. Send me songs for the run! Thanks to those of you who already have. My mom is coming on Friday. I can’t wait. People think because you’ve run more than one marathon that it must be a piece of cake. Let me tell you, the idea of it overwhelms me every year. I mean, I have had emotional breakdowns 50% of my marathons...so who knows how it will go with my moods. I wish Aransas was running with me, but we are trying to coordinate our next marathon. I just hope the new course, my ipod playlist, my mom’s support & cool weather will push me to the finish. While I would like to finish at around 4 hours, I would much rather finish & still be having a good time...and if that means slower, I’m all for it. The greatest part will be when it’s over, and I can focus on something else other than running. I’ve found a couple of boxing gyms & am either going to try kickboxing, buy a bike, or join this awesome gym next door to me (that’s not a chain & has mood lighting & flat screen tvs). Now that I have the ability to run 26 miles, I would also like to be able to punch someone in the face if necessary. Have a good week!
February 18, 2007 Happy President’s Day
Woo hoo for three day weekends. Actually, this week is awesome because I just completed an intense five-week middle school program (which is also a headache because it is part of a big study out of UCLA) & there is a two week break before we start the program up again with new students. I still have other classes, but those I can deal with. I am taking two days off to go to Vegas on Thursday, so I only have to work Tuesday and Wednesday! So no complaints from me this Sunday.
Last week wore me out (again). I get some sort of high from how much I invest in my teaching, though. Like any creative project, I get really, really into it & don’t notice until it’s over how draining it was. I have been working on new comedy improv work with some of the kids, and it’s a great new step for me to take in my teaching. Total freedom in my curriculum means such a lack of boredom in my work. I have had to refrain from getting to out of control with new ideas because of my dissertation stuff, but I’m looking forward to the day (very soon) where I can put so much of my focus on what’s happening at work. I did some more video editing, and there was a request for some filming equipment in the budget. Woo hoo! Loook for us on youtube soon. Anyways, I’m really feeling at home at work--and with my co-workers. It is the first job where I’ve really looked forward to building deeper connections with people and settling into the job a bit.
Speaking of, I’m going to be famous. OK, not really famous. But I’ve told you my buddy Wayne is a writer for A Socialite’s Life (gossip web site) & he’s starting to do video for them...I’m going to be one of the folks that comment on celebrity photos for him. So much fun! I’m going to tape tomorrow, so I’ll let you know when it’s up on the internet. Also, the first season of Strong Medicine is out on DVD. My first job as an extra was on that show. I played a car crash victim. I never saw the episode, but I’m tempted to watch those shows to find myself & start to build up my professional reel. Do you think they will ever put Moral Court on DVD? Because I actually had a line on that show.
I went on another eharmony adventure. Aren’t you proud? That’s two! Such an active dater. We went on a walk on the beach and fed birds. I am usually opposed to that kind of sentimentality, but I have decided I need to open up my mind a bit. Well, until he made me hold the stale hot dog bun in my hand & wait for the gulls to come get it...out of my hand!!! Yes, I did run away screaming at one point. I tried. I loved his idea of a short 1 1/2 hour date. If they were all like that, I could probably do it more often. I haven’t heard from him in a few days, though. So we may be “match closed”--who knows with these eharmony dudes.
I have so far had a great weekend. I was dead on Friday, but not wanting to pass out at 6pm, I took my Valentine’s Day money (yes, I got money on Valentine’s Day...no, I’m not a prostitute), went to best buy & bought some DVDs. I have the world’s smallest DVD collection, so I wanted to beef it up. I got the second season of The Office (American version), Talledega Nights and The Departed. I invited my buddy over & we watched the Talledega outtakes several times & then a marathon of The Office...which really grew on me. Anyway, it was popcorn, vodka, mixed nuts, lots of laughter...the way Fridays SHOULD be spent. It is sometimes good to meet friends that enjoy staying at home as much as I do. Saturday I met up with my friend Kendra...who I’ve known since Midland & am looking forward to hanging out with more here, cause she’s way cool...anyway, it was HOT here yesterday...we went to have some great mexican food in Santa Monica...back home & watched the remainder of The Office DVDS...and passed out. No dissertation writing, but I needed a day away from anything educational. I missed a friend who was in from NYC, but I’ll catch up with him soon I’m sure.
Today is an at home day...no plans except seeing The Last King of Scotland with some buddies if I do enough dissertation writing. I can’t believe the Oscars are in a week, and there’s still so much for me to see.
The marathon is in 2 weeks! I can’t believe it, and as usual, who knows if I’ve trained enough. My idea this time is just going into it like I rule the marathon world & the positive thinking will at least get me to mile 22. After that, well, lots of prayer. And itunes! Speaking of, you guys were nice enough several years ago to help me with my playlist & now I need a new one. It is my first time running with an ipod during a marathon, so i can fill the whole thing up with different songs! I have my own ideas for sure, but I’d love yours, too. Please email me & I’ll post the progress of the playlist. My mom is coming & we’ve booked a room downtown for the occasion. I can’t wait to see her & of course try out some new restaurants with her. My dad is coming out here for the first time sometime late summer. Oh, and my brother in April...don’t know why they don’t all come at once. I guess they get sick of each other and need vacation. I must admit, I like exploring with them one-on-one cause they have very different tastes.
I saw a great Oprah on child geniuses. I always am upset and uninterested when these episodes begin & I fall in love with EVERY child by the end. This time, they had this boy from India who was doing surgery at the age of 7. he is not only a genius--retaining all information upon reading it the first time, and he has big dreams: to stop all pain. He’s focusing on finding a cure all for ALL types of cancer right now, but he’s interested in finding a cure for AIDS as well. He’s 13 and a junior in college. He’s completely humble and amazingly grateful to his parents & is totally utilizing his gift in such awesome ways. So, whenever I complain about being tired or depleted or overworked...let me think back to this kid curing cancer. This was followed by a girl who came up with a product for black women’s hair that is all natural and doesn’t make it fall out. I bet this girl was totally bitter that she followed that surgery dude.
That’s it from here. I promise to have some pictures up post-Vegas next weekend. I hear it’s snowing in Texas. For real? Oh, and I think I’m going back to get my hair done again. I think it was the kid who said “Why are you wearing a wig?” that did it. I am seriously thinking about rocking the brunette look again for awhile.
February 10, 2007 Punk Rock, Charley Pride & Self Checkout
So many things to cover today. First off, self checkout at the grocery store is now one of my favorite things. In NY, I became accustomed to going to the grocery store often & never buying too much. I don’t like to load the cart up. I’m a hand-held basket shopper. At our Albertsons, they have 4 whole self checkout centers that have been open all the time for the past few weeks. Not only do I like not having to stand in line, but I like scanning items, keying in codes, doing my own bagging. Yes, I have control issues. Instead of the 18 bags they use to bag my four apples, I can walk out of the store with only 2 bags total. I’m not sure if you can buy alcohol at these things, but luckily the drunk in me loses out to the impatience.
I went to my hair lady yesterday. She is officially my hair lady, even though I’ve only seen her twice. I really like her. First off, she has an accent, as all good hair stylists should. She will advise me on what she thinks will look good, which is always something I’m looking for in a hair person. This time it ended up even more punk rock than before. The longest layers on the bottom are dark dark brown & the top is still blonde with some dark highlights for a little kick. She really likes experimenting with colors & when I left, it looked like a work of art. Like all great art, though, my hair might be misunderstood. People might say, “Why do you look like a skunk?” It is because those people don’t understand. OK, when I looked in the mirror this morning, maybe I said the same skunk comment to myself...but it has a sense of fun I usually don’t go for with my hair. It looks like I should have tattoos or something. I am either gradually going back to being a brunette, or I will be done with my punk days & become a Pam Anderson blonde soon. Now that I have a hair lady, I’m totally comfortable with whatever direction she takes. She could also tell I cut my bangs. “Deese are not my bangs!!” (wait, that came out wrong, she’s not German.) She rocks.
So, big week out on the town-which left me totally exhausted at school. Two weeknights out did me in. The first was the Lily Allen concert with Wayne and Jon. We had to wait for like 2 hours to see her perform--which is what I hate most about live music...the waiting involved. I want it to be like the movies, predictable...esp. on a Monday night. But she still rocked. Thursday I went to the country music thing. It started out (late again!) pretty boring...other than a great rendition of Crazy by Leann Rimes. They showed odd clips from the Country Music Hall of Fame archives (President Nixon playing the piano??? what?)...Porter Wagoner came out. He used to have his own show & partnered up with Dolly for awhile. She wrote the song “I will always love you” about him when she decided to leave the show. Anyway, he’s like 100 years old & had two young girls walk him out onstage. He was looking hot in his sequined suit...man i miss the old country music outfit days. If I’m ever in a band, I’m going to insist on sequined designs. Anyway, he comes out with a guitar that he doesn’t play & doesn’t actually sing any of the song. He just talks us through it. I don’t care, though, he was still way cooler than I’ll ever be, even with my punk hair. They showed clips of interviews with songwriters, which I found very interesting. It is so strange to hear about inspirations for these classic songs...and also showed how far-reaching country song writers were--writing hits for Ray Charles! Elvis Costello! Because a good song is a good song. I used to respect those country performers that wrote their own music a little bit more than the others--but now it’s not how I feel at all. Some people are really great songwriters & some are really great performers. The show ended with several performances. Terrance Howard (from Hustle and Flow fame) came on and introduced Charley Pride & announced he would be playing Charley in a biopic directed by the director of Hustle and Flow (who was also in the audience). Ummm, I can’t wait for that one! And then Charley came on & sang “Kiss and Angel Good Morning” and “Is anybody goin’ to San Antone?” & he was brilliant, of course. The whole show ended with the host coming out and making us all stand up & sing some old spiritual. I didn’t know any of the words, but I caught on ASAP so I could join in on that wacky fun. This doesn’t happen everyday in L.A.
Today, Saturday, I get to spend the day at home! These are my favorite kind of “wind down” days. Of course, it means writing the dissertation, but I am grateful for that time...even if it comes in small pieces these days. I’m also editing some video that the kids filmed this week. I just fixed myself the most amazing peanut butter+banana sandwich (I had given up wheat on a whim because of stomach problems after the half marathon. I actually ate rice bread. I don’t recommend it. It’s a mix between rubber & year old pound cake. i tried toasting it, warming it in the microwave...nothing changed it’s consistency). I’ve decided not to do another extra long run before the marathon. With my December injury, I just don’t want to push things. Instead, I’ll aim for a speedy 12-13 miler for the next couple of weekends. I’ve got a co-ed baby shower tomorrow. I’ve never been to a baby shower for one of my friends. I AM getting old. There is apparently “beer, champagne and food galore,” and I can’t think of a better way to celebrate a baby on the way. I just hope I don’t have to utter “Oh, how cute!” more than a couple of times. I’m not a baby person.
Speaking of, my brother and his wife are doing well--just talked to him briefly on the phone. OH, my nephew Sam left the most precious message on my phone the other day. “I love you, Kristy.” I had to replay it at least 4 times because I couldn’t get enough. Anyway, they are all home from the hospital & adapting to life with 2 kids. Sophie and Sam! I’m sure I’ll have more pics to post soon. Sam is about to turn 3!!! I need to visit soon.
Valentine’s Day is Wednesday. Are you making your little cardboard valentines with doilies surrounding them? I, big surprise, am not. I don’t really adore chocolate or hearts, so this is not the holiday for me. I prefer bbq, beer and fireworks, personally. What better way to celebrate TRUE LOVE? Speaking of, the local Ralph’s grocery store had Shinerbock! It used to be almost impossible to find out here. Ah, Texas...
This post is long enough. Did I say work was rough this week? Not any major problems, but there’s just a midway point in the session that leaves me exhausted, creatively, mentally, physically. I still love it, but I need a second wind! Vegas, come quick! Revive me! Oh wait, three day weekend next week!?!? That will do the trick. Obama is running for president. I’ve got to go finish reading his book and see what I think of him.
February 6, 2007 I have a niece!
Yup, Kristen had the kid, finally. I’m sure there will be more pics coming shortly, but for now, enjoy the ones on the front page. Everyone is doing well & they will be leaving the hospital on Thursday. Sam is precious & drew a picture to put in his little sister’s new crib! If only my big brother was so kind to me, I could’ve turned out normal.
February 5, 2007 Yes, it’s in the 70s. I love L.A.
Really, it took me several months to start to feel comfortable here, but the time has finally arrived...mostly because it’s SO warm in February! Beautiful sunny day.
Anyway, I ran the Pacific Shoreline Half Marathon yesterday in Huntington Beach (about 50 minutes south of L.A.). I ran it in 2004, so I was familiar with the course. It’s almost completely an out and back on the road next to the beach. It takes a few miles in around some “wetlands” (which might be attractive except for the tons of oil rigs sitting there...did remind me of Midland, though). And a beautiful day...until we turned around and faced the sun for the last half. My plan was to run this my marathon goal pace: 9:10 min. miles--trying to get used to this pace prior to marathon day. Unfortunately, it’s a race, and my mind can’t quite comprehend slowing down on purpose when people are running past you. Instead, I crossed the first mile almost a minute too fast. I kept up this way too speedy pace for several miles (bad idea), then made it to 8:30 miles for awhile--but by mile 10 I was SPENT. And running this thing, in the back of my mind is “I’ve got a marathon in a month, don’t kill myself over this.” so like a baby, I take short walk breaks in the end. Weak, I know. I still finished 5 minutes faster than my goal time of 2hrs, but I probably could’ve finished 5 minutes faster than that if I would’ve paced myself from the beginning. Luckily, in the last mile, some guy came right up beside me & picked up the pace, trying to get me going. These are the moments I LOVE in racing. I kept up for awhile (definitely stopped me from taking another break), but eventually let him speed ahead. I ran the last 1/2 mile with a huge grin on my face--I couldn’t help it...there’s the beach RIGHT BESIDE ME! and big crowds cheering me on. Also, the song from Dreamgirls--Listen--is playing in my ipod & helping me sprint to the end. It has been several months since my previous race, and I forget how much I LOVE them. It made me want to focus my future training on the half marathon because I think it’s the perfect distance for me to run without losing all sanity.
After that, the plan was to come home, maybe take a nap & head off to this Superbowl party I’ve been promising to attend for years. Unfortunately, I came home & had lunch (including a celebratory beer) & my stomach just couldn’t handle it. I should’ve stuck to some gatorade or something, because I spent the rest of the day laying on the couch reading a book. Oh well. I don’t like football anyway.
The weekend sped by unfortunately, but I had some fun. Wayne celebrated his birthday with a HUGE group at a restaurant called Hamburger Mary’s--I ordered a margarita to celebrate & it was huge...others were calling it a “cauldron”-sized beverage. And they gave me a mountain of a salad. Good times.
I think my sister-in-law is supposed to be having her baby today. I think they’re inducing. But, I haven’t received a phone call, so I’m not really sure how all that works. Childbirth: a mystery. Speaking of, I need to go buy that baby a track suit and some trainers pronto! I hope I can make a trip out to Denver, soon. My dreams of snowboarding again this season are most likely not coming true, but I AM going to Vegas this month-my mom is visiting next month & then my brother in April. So fun times will be had, just not on the slopes. On Demand has an exercise section, which of course I frequent cause I’m a dork--and they actually have one show on snowboarding tips that I watch to pretend that I’m getting better.
OH, some great news. Finally this week I see some live music. It’s been since July & who knows how long before then (Willie Nelson in NY?). Tonight it’s hipster sensation Lily Allen. I am not what you would call a “hipster” & usually detest their hipness and hatred of country music & even the converse. If converse had heels, then maybe I could fit in. But anyway, this girl has a wonderful album out. One song starts off sounding like the Blossom theme song. You can’t NOT like it. I am excited to see her, but I am also impatient with shows. It seems like half the time you’re waiting for the band to come on, all squashed together, smelling like pot and sweat (not me, but those hipster people...I of course smell like Sarah Jessica Parker’s perfume...). But even bigger is this thing I’m attending on Thursday. First off, it’s FREE. Second, it’s a celebration of country music! In Los Angeles! It’s going to be half screening/half performances--the Grammy Foundation’s celebration...saluting some of the Country Music’s Hall of Fame archives--showing some old stuff from the Grand Ole’ Opry & also some live performances. Here’s the live line up: Charlie Pride (!!! Yes, I have a 3 CD set of his I bought in Nashville), Leann Rimes, Deana Carter, Shooter Jennings (Waylon’s son, who I saw last year)...and i forget the rest. Oh, Terrance Howard from one of my favorite movies--Hustle and Flow--is going to be there. Swoon. Anyway, just found out about this & am super pumped.
That’s it, I guess. Still feeling a bit lethargic from post half-marathon. Hoping to wake up sometime soon. Have a good week!
January 28, 2007 I did the long run
So, I actually did the 20 miler this afternoon/evening, and it was CRAZY. I don’t know if I’ve ever actually run that far for a training run before--certainly not by myself. What a rush! My good friend and her sister have decided to start training for a half marathon in October (their first race), and I am doing it with them--I was so motivated by their running (I LOVE when people start running...esp in races), that I went for one & just kept going.
Now, I don’t recommend doing a 3 hr 20 min run at 3:30pm, esp. when it’s dark at 5. I varied the run this time. I went out to the Marina (Marina Del Rey) as usual, but I went north through all the boats & directly to Venice Beach. I got totally lost in the Marina, but the way back was smoother. The sun was setting as I got to Venice, and it was just beautiful. I usually only do beach runs in the morning (weekends), so it was fun to be able to run at night--so beautiful. Of course, it’s Venice, so there was a gigantic drum circle, which usually gives me a headache (too many hippies at once)...but somehow brought some excitement into the run.
The way back was just frightening. By now, it’s almost pitch black & I was not prepared. No one is running or biking anymore. Also, I brought no energy bars or anything--just my dorky water belt w/ two big bottles of water & gatorade. At some point on the way back, I actually lost one of these bottles. I have no idea what happened. I started going crazy about mile 16. I started singing some of my ipod tunes very loudly...Michael Jackson’s “black or white” was one that I remember. I got SO into the lyric: “And I’m not gonna spend my life being a color.” I almost scared myself. Who knew I had such passionate feelings about being a white girl? It is these moments of insanity that end up being highlights of the run. The last mile was REALLY tough, even imagining a finish line, as I often do at the end of long runs, didn’t help. But it was good to get through it alive. My GPS device went dead after mile 15...oops! But I measured the way out there, so I can be sure of my mileage.
Anyway, the great news is that next weekend I don’t have to add anything on to the half marathon. I can start and end with everyone else & then enjoy some FOOTBALL!
Have a great week.
January 28, 2007 Ahhh, Sunday.
It’s Sunday morning. I was going to do a 20 miler today, but I’m not feeling it. Instead, I’ve signed up for a half marathon next weekend, so I’m going to run that & add seven miles to make it my last and longest run before the marathon. I am going to get out there for at least 10-12 miles later on today. I’m feeling tired this morning and sluggish. I spent the early part of last week feeling that way & wasn’t motivated to do much of anything outside of work. This left me with all of my hard runs towards the end of the week—a bad idea if you wanna do a long run on Sunday. Oh well.
This weekend has been pretty chill. I love those weekends. I do good with one social activity a weekend. That is plenty for me. Last night, I went to see the Mirman School play that my good friend and former boss directed. It was spectacular, as usual. A few of us went out for drinks afterwards at the Cheesecake Factory, and I was home by midnight reading my new Entertainment Weekly. Perfect!
I am so excited—the building of the theatre complex at Inner-City is happening…and soon! I get to go to the planning meetings, and it’s so beyond anything I’ve ever worked on before—I mean, I’ve taught in parking lots, dirt, cramped classrooms, etc…and now to have an actual THEATRE…one with dressing rooms, a greenroom, a lobby with a gallery space, great sound system, lights, etc. They are demolishing the building on the corner of our lot—sometime next month. I’m equally excited about seeing a building being torn down. Hopefully I will have a class then, and we can take a field trip outside. Really, though, when it’s complete (which granted, will take TIME), it will multiply the possibilities…and the experience for the kids—many of whom have never been inside a theatre…such a cool opportunity.
What could be better? Well, maybe the trip to Vegas I’m going on in a few weeks! woo hoo! It is perfect timing for a road trip and for the ease of a Vegas Vacation. Someone emailed me asking, “what do we do during the day?” I couldn’t think of an answer. Walk down the strip (hard to comprehend, but this does somehow take all day), drink, point at crazy people, eat, repeat.
Super Bowl Sunday next week. I’m happy to be attending a Super Bowl party that’s been happening for years—but somehow I’ve never made it to (even during me and chuck’s attempt at party-hopping every quarter). The half marathon is the same day, so I can’t wait for a day of running followed by trashy food. Don’t tell anyone, but I have no idea who is playing. But I do know the Rockets have one their last 2 games!!! and Serena kicked butt in tennis this week. I can’t keep up with everything.
I’ve been having horrible dreams lately. One of them involved me thinking my brother (who was about 5 yrs old) was lying dead in the bath tub (although apparently, he was just taking a nap). I actually went through amazing amounts of grief…in my sleep! I didn’t even know this was possible. I also had this really odd dream where I went on the computer to MySpace and ended up on an ex-boyfriend’s site where he went on and on about FINALLY finding a good woman, after years of nothing but junk. All the pictures were of him and her, but he would never show her face…only her legs, elbows, etc. I woke up vowing to never visit any ex’s website ever again. Not that I don’t want anything but happiness for them, but I do NOT need it shoved in my face. I woke up again feeling the worst kind of heart break, and not exactly understanding why? I used to never remember dreams…I thought it was my bad sleeping habits, I’m still not sure. But lately, I have these vivid, often violent, always emotional dreams. Any dream analyzers out there? What’s the deal? The dog in the blender dream was the worst by far.
One thing I love about living in L.A.—the movie scene. You can find all sorts of movies playing here—classics, cult hits, the big films, the small films, cheap festivals, etc. I really can’t wait until the dissertation is over, and I can jump back into the world of movies without the guilt. Anyways, the Academy does this wonderful night called “Shorts” in which they screen all of the oscar-nominated short films that no one ever sees! Which means I can be that annoying girl who actually cheers or jeers when one of these films wins! Sweet. Is it bad that I sometimes wish for a boyfriend that is a member of the academy, just so I can watch the screeners they send their way? It probably is bad, so I take that back. There was a hypnotist on eharmony that I was really curious about, mainly cause I wanted him to hypnotize me into sleeping well. But then I feared he could hypnotize me into doing crazy stuff, like doing his laundry or washing his car. Match closed.
Have a good week!!!
January 27, 2007 Guilty Women
My little brother makes fun of me for bringing up Oprah so much, but here I go again. I didn’t have time to catch the shows during the week, so I watched them all early this Saturday morning. She did one show on “30 somethings in America” and one on “Working/Stay at home mom debate.” Viewing these back to back was just embarrassing. There were some women grateful for their place in life, but mostly it was women feeling bad/guilty about not living up to some sort of standard they (or as they said, “society”) set for themselves. Some felt bad because they were in their 30s and single (gasp!), others were borderline crazy because they couldn’t conceive (spending tens of thousands of dollars trying), moms felt bad because they worked too much, or because they didn’t work at all, etc, etc. It was one big whine fest that I was ashamed to be associated with. Finally, women have the opportunity for more choices in their lives, and all we can seem to do is complain about it.
So, my mom. She’s totally a working mom. She actually tried to stay home with me and my older brother and apparently went out of her mind & started watching Days of Our Lives & decided she had to get back to work. She has worked full time ever since. It always seemed like she was home—same with my dad, even though I’m sure they had their share of guilt for not always being there. It certainly helped to have my big brother around—and then my little brother. The house was never quiet. Weekends were total family time, and honestly, that was enough. My mom was not just working, but she continued to be extremely successful in a VERY male-dominated field—and this has served as an inspiration to me in my own life. Both Mom and Dad taught me by example that hard work pays off—and that, more than any words of advice, has given me a great gift. I’ve actually never believed that I couldn’t achieve something I really wanted to work at. It has never even occurred to me, and my parents encouraged me (still do) to follow any desire or goal I have (as strange as they may seem). They’ve provided an amazing example for me…not even an example…but an actual way of living that helped me focus on my goals and how to go about reaching them. With my new PhD goal and a dream job at Inner-City, there is endless opportunity for me to continue to grow and advance in my career, and sure work is not everything—but I could never thank my mom enough for working full time—a job she enjoys, is good at, is passionate about. Did she miss out on my first steps? Guess what, I have no idea cause I don’t even remember last weekend.& |
